here I am

Well here I am my LORD. My life feels  flat.

Or maybe I'm just drained emotion’ly.

Or even that I've been sick. How could that

effect my inside life so, seemingly?

As soon as I put words to that “strangeness”,

I know in part the answer to what’s posed:

I’m built to have a body; it’s “changeness”

gives challenge to live here as not a ghost,

but really as a human (baby god)

who’s always meant to have a body too.

But though a human always is a bod’,

they could still have “authority” in view,

thus I could be affected, yet not ruled,

by physical accomplishments and things.

Thus I'll admit, but yet will not be fooled

to thinking I'm the great God, and my wings

are refuge and protection for the world.

I'll be the baby, who needs help from Dad,

and Mum, who succour and, if truth be told,

help me to grow to take the pain I've had

and that I've still got coming. He’s who said:

“In this world you’ll have trouble” - so be warned,

but then he added (knowing he’d be dead

for three days, and his “sweating blood” he scorned)

“But take heart, for the world I’ve overcome”

And so I do, and trust his bigger view.

But still, I will when speaking, and when dumb,

look up, and open up - my feelings too.

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For it is commendable if someone bears up under the pain of unjust suffering because they are conscious of God. But how is it to your credit if you receive a beating for doing wrong and endure it? But if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps.  ‘He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.’ When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. 1 Peter 2:19‭-‬23 NIVUK

‘A time is coming and in fact has come when you will be scattered, each to your own home. You will leave me all alone. Yet I am not alone, for my Father is with me.   ‘I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.’. John 16:32‭-‬33 NIVUK

Therefore, since Christ suffered in his body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because whoever suffers in the body has finished with sin. As a result, they do not live the rest of their earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. The end of all things is near. Therefore be alert and of sober mind so that you may pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.  Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. 1 Peter 4:1‭-‬2‭, ‬7‭-‬12 NIVUK