..not just "he said.."..

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(with a rolling "h") heséd*

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Oh God, I'd hardly know of love that's true

except I've had a taste of it myself;

both ways, from you my Father to me through

both friends & family here on Earth. No stealth-

-y project. Pretty much full-on since birth-

day parties, kisses, hugs, and holding hands

show off, exalt, and celebrate with mirth,

the love of life which knows & understands.

And though I'm often late, not organized,

and immature, and baby-ish a lot,

and find I do, what I've often despised;

quite inconsistent, often I've forgot-

ten times when I've been loved; just soaked it in

as though it was fresh air, for me to breathe.

Oh God, as I look back, maybe the sin

I've most committed, and what I now grieve,

is just not seeing love, when it's been there,

and I've been in it, like a fish at sea.

But also, there've been times I've shown the care 

of you my Father through me to fam'ly

and friends on Earth; and here, you push me on

to love my enemies, with love from you.

Then celebrate that love with poem & song.

I'm letting your good crop grow in me to

both multiply, and influence quite deep

this shallow soil. Your anger doesn't boil,

but softly whispers to me as I sleep

and wake, in hesed love. You are my foil°!

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*  heséd is the Hebrew word for loyal love, or keeping one's word, or covenant commitment, undergirding its friends and associates like justice, tender mercies, and compassion.

°  foil: two (of 4) meanings outlined by the Cambridge Dictionary that are fulfilled by God in my life are:

• something or someone that makes another's good or bad qualities more noticeable:

e.g. foil for The older, cynical character in the play is the perfect foil for the innocent William.

• to prevent someone or something from being successful:

e.g.The prisoners' attempt to escape was foiled at the last minute when police received a tip-off.

[In this case I understand "successful" to mean to succeed in my instinctive, first level of response, in order to gain and "work out" this partnership's response. I am thinking of the way the two hemispheres of the human brain affect each other with inhibitory impulses, designed, I suppose to give time for a responsecto be hammered out from the full partnership utilizing the benefits that come along with the frustrations involved in a communal, combined view.]

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Background Notes

• We are brought down to the dust; our bodies cling to the ground. Rise up and help us; rescue us because of your unfailing love. (Psalms 44:25‭-‬26 NIVUK)

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