2020-11-09

Considering continuing, consolidating...

I live with confidence, though many things 

around me are much less than  certainties.

Well, ack-sh-el-ly each one of us now brings

inside us, to this world, communities.


And from this basis (which is who we are)

we build more of the kinds of habitats

and worlds we represent. We're like a star,

or constellation, which stays where its at,


still bringing tiny bits of light to "here",

that have the signatures of where they're from,

and ev'ry night on Earth, they may appear,

but from some galaxies light-years along…


So, knowing just the little that we know

of what a human is (&) meant to be,

will give me ways to offer, and to show,

the little understanding that we "see".


Which might enable pressure to come off,

and then a portal open up in space,

and let our worlds move, well, get close enough

to make responses which will not disgrace.


And somehow when we aren't the centre self

then we can learn to know in diff'rent ways,

not just a set of facts, though that can help,

but as folk know each other ev'ry day.


So, if it's true, I'll "know as I am known"

which must be of that real, & pers'nal, kind

of knowing which is deeper, more full-blown

than scientific formulas in mind.






2020-11-05

Living in two dimensions, or kinds of worlds, at once. 

e.g.  the relational world, and the world of tasks. Or…


A tune that keeps repeating itself more,

in mind throughout the day is mod'ling this, -

this way of life that I am hank'ring for,

a way of dying to my deathly wish..


 ... which is concerned with only "my desires",

my piddly little likes, and wants, and stuff,

like not having to grow to what inspires

the higher level of Passions - more tough.


And now I see this theme repeated heaps,

this living for a higher purpose which

will grow a fruit tree in me, one which reaps

the life of all the ages, that we itch


to see, and find and take it's fruit for us.

But maybe it's seeds grow within that place,

that hidden garden watched by messengers

of Yahweh who has eyes in ev'ry space.


A garden that's more like a tabernac-

le, tent that's kinder like a fence of sorts,

with skin walls … to demark the holy tract

all specially fenced off - dif'rent to forts. ..


And yet, a bit the same: "You shall not pass!"

It says ..", unless you come in as a friend."

To them it's opened up, and not held fast.

This tardis on the inside doesn’t end.


I guess, I'll have to jump in there and see.

Yup, see what he comes up with, him & me.

With me his under-study, that will be

a lot of fun. To live within that  "we".



Think of :

  1. Timothy - "I hope in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to you soon, that I also may be cheered when I receive news about you. I have no-one else like him, who will show genuine concern for your welfare. For everyone looks out for their own interests, not those of Jesus Christ. Philippians 2:19‭-‬21 NIVUK

 (think plans, desires, at overall and small decision-making points not looking up to heaven and even sighing deeply, just taking it in their stride, as though they are up to this)...

  1. THE THORNY SOIL, "but the worries and cares of this life, and the desires for things crowd in and choke the word, so that it does not bear fruit." (MARK 4:1-~20)

  2. Phoebie the deaconess (Rom16:1-2), like Simon's mother-in-law (Mk1:29-31), - served them all - well! C.f. Mary and Martha, (Lk10:end)

  3. "What I mean, brothers and sisters, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they do not; those who mourn, as if they did not; those who are happy, as if they were not; those who buy something, as if it were not theirs to keep; those who use the things of the world, as if not engrossed in them. For this world in its present form is passing away.

1 Corinthians 7:29‭-‬31 NIVUK

The right mindset Paul looks to be engendering amongst those he is writing to is to living in this world, in the relationships of marriage, or ownership of material things,  while maintaining the overarching mindset of Christ. A mindset that these things are temporary, fleeting, soon to be over (unlike that foolish rich man- Lk 12 early on). So, making plans for the long haul, not just the next 50-100yrs. (Think of that book on Marriage by Francis Chan & his wife: "You & me forever")



Related to this issue, but not the same, is learning to have a will (choosing capacity based on a bigger and better basis than "my wants", "my desires") that is separate from and bigger than (& differentiated from) my desires.


Cf.: 

  • She "desired it, and took it" (design pattern)

Gk word epithumia-  unbounded, desire. The state of being ruled by your desire - in practice, lust.

  • 2Pet1:3-6

  • 1Thess 4:1-8(?)

  • YESHUA at his last meal.. "with desire I have desired to have this meal with you.."

  • YESHUA IN THE GARDEN: "~Here is my desire. ., but its place is to be admitted & noted, and yet NOT allowed to have its way, as though it was in charge.. Not my will, but your will, be the thing that is done or followed.

  • So that we might live no longer for ourselves (our desires - put as the ruling principle), but for him, whose motive force is love - not virtually, but actually.

  • Ps37:5 to those who trust (?) him,.. he gives the desires of their heart (not always and invariably, but overarchingly and ultimately) - it's a matter of timing…. 


Timing?  Pay now in waiting and growing patience, and get your desires fulfilled really, ongoingly, and ultimately.. or get the "puffed up, bloated, vitual version", the "quick-fix" now, lose the chance to learn to wait, and develop patience, and then pay on-gingly and ultimately, for something that doesn’t fulfill, and doesn't properly develop that desire. Every desire is a seed that has to lose it's identity in our ground (of being) in order to grow and develop properly. After humanity has sinned... Having lost living, conscious (and unconscious) connection with the one greater than us, whose desires are bigger and greater than ours, we have defaulted to being ruled by our desires, which were meant in fact to be the next thing under his desire for us. "Do you want tea, coffee or juice?" "What colour do you want your wall?" These aren't  bad things, just bad to be your GOD, or ultimate ruller. Not bad to prefer trout over tuna, or barley over lentils. They need to be admitted, noted, and only "appropriately" given reign, ie. When they don't go against a bigger better will, or rule, or reign, - that of LOVE. This gives us the WAY to live in this world, the way to not be overcome by it, or ruled by chemicals or any desire that can (& will) become our ruler if we let it. So, when Jesus sends out his emissaries he says "eat whatever is set before you,", (and Paul adds, to explain for the gentile mission's new situation, "unless it offends conscience,- theirs, not yours", )

  • Jesus Christ thinking of others (the rule of God, who is Love, hesed, agape), before himself.

  • Right kind of suffering,  is Suffering because one is "concious of God" - living in his presence, awake to him. 1 Peter ch2, "committed his/their cause/self to their faithful creator, and go on doing all the good they can"


The question or point of exploration for me at the moment, is how to express that consciousness… not in words only, but in actions too. How to give voice to it, in its preferred language (which may be body language). I want to learn from him how to speak.   Even when communicating with him.