..and learning..
God bless this man, your son, and father of
the children you have given them so far.
And give your grace to raise them to know love,
experience your khesed where they are!
God bless this man, your son, and father of
the children you have given them so far.
And give your grace to raise them to know love,
experience your khesed where they are!
Lord, you're the one who gave us hearts of flesh.
We want them to beat right in time with yours.
To see the good around, and get enmeshed
in multiplying it in time, because
that's what you said to do, and your good word
is food and drink to us, the way to life
that's worth the living. But we've also heard
of your great grief* endured, 'coz of your "wife*".
We want to enter into joy and grief
in company with you who bears them both.
Your company is what brings our relief.
And also leads us on - to all our growth!
Oh God, I feel embarrassed about us,
the way we are so programed, so to speak,
& though we are in charge of Earth, we're dust.
I feel two kinds of shame: So strong! So weak!
And now I think a bit more (while in love),
I’m being led by you to understand,
stand under your authority above
what you have put me over, as you planned!
Some shame can come from immaturity
that’s right and proper, for that’s how all growth
must happen on this Earth, where limits be.
But some’s from wasting, slackness, even both.
And forward way that’s good today, for all
is “truth to tell” - to think! to say! as small,
as well as big, let human mind not fall
in one rut or the other. But stand tall*.
And be the little toddler that I am!
Both showing off my skills (and prowess too);
and laughing at myself as a “big man”
who’s “free*”, but glad to be a person who
is growing in a family who loves,
so here I need to stand under my Dad
& Mum, and learn from hand that doesn’t shove
so much as lead and draw me on a tad…
I own my shame, then name the kind I see.
Then in the presence of the God of all,
I laugh, and smile, repent, forgiven be!
Move on, both kneeling down, AND standing tall.
Please help, Lord of the heavens and the earth,
for me as builder of a dwelling place,
to understand our needs and what they’re worth
to value truly, minimise disgrace.
In working with the rules of this good land
& honouring our government’s job here,
to help us live responsibly, and stand
up on our legs, and not to just appear
that way, but have in fact, a good impact
on this world, as environment and web,
as ecosystem, so in word and act
we’ll use authority we have to tread
lightly, where we must, while serving all
with sense of that proportion which is tuned
to outcomes for the whole she-bang, not small-
ly thinking just to minimise our wound.
So using the resources of your world,
and using our own income as He* would,
to value add in this place we’ve been hurled,
and make this whole adventure pretty good
for serving all the humans you put here,
to serve this Earth to bring your will as is
the case in heaven, as it does appear
from what he said to ask in prayer of his..
his teaching of his children to enact
the kind of life that manifests on Earth
the life which your eternal love has tracked
down here where we have all had our first birth.
Sleeping and waking affected by yapping dog
God, you sent those folk next to hell ’n we..
We know you love their neighbour, and her kids.
We pray for insight, creativity,
and grace from your own spirit under lids.
So, I can either take for granted gifts
you’ve given me like beating heart, and chest
that breathes involuntarily to lift
“cells” up to function as a human, best
seen in that model human - Jesus Christ,
whom God has chosen as the leader of
Humanity. His life and death sufficed
to show, and pique our appetite for love.
The fight is waged on many fronts just now,
and hatred, or just boredom’s love-lack ways
will do all that it can to break and bow
us at its feet, as though that then displays
the winning of the war it wants to wage
to beat another “ideology”;
for it cannot endure, on the same page
another getting honour or glory.
But he was “just a builder” from that town
on cliff-side, where things were precarious
and needed good foundations, and a frown
of thought to stand things up on various
odd angles against gravity’s down-pull..
And humans in His story are concerned
to let their “Yes”, have meaning, be faithful
to their own word, and God’s good that they’ve learned.
They’re learning to give place to feelings and
God's given, programed, built-in gifts/ desires,
but also to discern an order planned
to give ascendancy to KHESED’s* fires!
God, please help Sis. ta speak the truth in love,
and see your image in those round about
her, as she loves your image from above,
formed in her staying/ going in & out.
Love Xx Oo
How do I lead in loving? If that’s what
a husband’s job is under God’s world-view.
I just saw two things i could do a lot
more over coming weeks please help me do
them. Scared, I am. For I see others might
just misinterpret one of them as me
reverting to old ways of holding tight-
-ly to control. And so I let her free.
But afterwards she felt I didn’t care
for her. Maybe ‘coz others got my gaze:
my focus, or my time. Folk who came where
I was. I feel prejudged, and caught these days.
Just like machines and animals might fight.
No malice, and no bragging. Just “They won.”
Or lost. They act as though they’re in the right,
some options do not show, if not begun.
But once begun, they hardly can be hid-
den, lion’s lair is where it wants to tear
to pieces and eat up each tiny bit.
Love wins if it does.. KNOW that God is ne’er
absent. ’Coz he’s “near” but will not man-..
man-ip-ul-ate or pressure those he loves.
He’ll ask the questions love asks - if it can.
And if it can’t it might enact. No shoves!
Oh God I’m such a baby at that love.
I now recall that you are here, with me.
My help comes from the Lord. Comes “from above”.
Your vantage point allows that more you see.
But if the spirit* of his son who cries
out to YaHWeH: “my Daddy*” in his grief,
and pain, and need, discussing as he tries
to understand, while trusting GOD’s belief…
in him, and hearing God’s word spoken when
it’s breathed (on God’s own breath*) into his ear
(as dove that stays on shoulder might do when
it softly coos, or warbles, always “near*”);
& breathed on breath that breathed on prophets past
(& some got written down - though not that much),
and breathed through “mind that’s set*” as Paul at last
speaks of God’s own - responsive to his touch,
his indication, verbal, or to look
at things he “got across” to us somehow
by pointing, or associations cook-
’d up through the hist’ry of our lives to now.
A fierce wind* that blew the oceans round
at the beginning, other times exposed
dry land beneath the water that was found
by feet of slaves escaping unjust foes.
Another time it blew together “shaved”
dry bones of long-gone bodies and enfleshed
an old/new people from those un-en-graved
and desecrated, for ends that were meshed
with goodness as it weaves with wisdom’s ways
a new creation under KHESED-love
which is here shown in clear enough displays
in such a way we know it’s “from above*”.
I’m learning much by looking more at my
young grandson who is three years old just now.
He’s confident and bois-ter-ous. He’ll try.
Determined to grow, have a shot, know how.
While I feel more retiring, past my date.
And stuck in habits. Voice says: “Just give up”.
But I am hearing you. That’s not my fate!
You see me, as I see that tiny “pup”.
You're confident (and boisterous). You’ll try.
Determined to grow me. You’ll have a shot!
And since you will persist, then by.., and by…,
I’ll grow, and know, and learn how, why, and what…
The partnership is poss-ib-il-it-ies.
Alone, my feelings of despair prove true!
That dead-end way finds only what it sees.
It seize-s not, nor adventures with you.
And I will knuckle under your good will
for me, because you think about what’s good
’n’ true, for all that is, and will until
it comes to be, existent. Now I could
as well, ‘coz all inertia’s lost its sting.
You’ve led the way, and made available
Christ’s life-blood with its antibodies brings
it's antivenom unassailable.
That blood is poisonous to poisons round
because it is the source of life and health.
One life, a portal bringing heaven down
to Earth, & Earth to heavens. Health & wealth!
There is a sense in which there’s much of God
I have no clue about. I just don’t know.
There’s much that he’s experienced, a lot
in fact for me to learn from “tell and show”.
And sometimes diff’rent cultures may have some..
some diff’rent edges on aspects of the..
the culture of eternity that’s come
down close enough for us to touch and see
and learn some diff’rent ways of acting out ..
it’s culture that gives boundaries that make
for more of that creative love that’ll shout
or whisper to bring understanding 's slake-
-king of our thirst for knowledge which is best
kept centred on my father’s will, and self
and when the task he gives me is a test
for everyone to see and know my health
in order to join in and work for good..
good purposes which I must learn (not hate!)
in rote ways, how to join in as I should
if I were not to stand out but relate
and then myself be understood as well.
For words aren’t all, but then God’s Word in past,
is what has come and saves us from the hell
we bring when we live our will first not last.
My grandson is my helper here today*.
He mirrored my responses as I’ve done.
He helped me see from distance what I say
and do. Thank you, my three-year-old grandson!
I am at peace, with knowing you yourself,
not just an understanding of some facts* -
capacity to model on a shelf
the thoughts and words and hopes and all the acts
of that Creative Love that gives language
as gift to help us model and to learn
and not be too upset if at this stage
of life our language still falls short, no spearn-
-ing of this gift because it’s not as great
as who gave it. I’m thankful for help on
the Way he walked, as small child in the state
of toddler hand-in-hand. His light upon
this small world where the cosmos was lit up
by that one visit as a man who’s shown
us all a solid prophet interrup-
-ting all the plans of mice and men alone.
For we were never just another one.
We’re made more like a Left brain hemisphere
that’s meant to work in tandem, but as “son”
in terms of who’s the boss. The Right is clear-
-ly in Authority, and this must be,
for only it connects us to the world
that’s larger round about us. And now HE
has lived it out and called us to be hurled
out as ambassadors of this new/ old-
-est way of living which does not need food
& drink for that’s internally resolved
by HIS resources inside. We’ve been clued*!
Footnotes
s* - Psalm 131
d* - “These women looked after him from their own resources”. (Luke 8:2-3); and he said “take, eat. Share among yourselves.” (Three gospels) “unless you eat.., & drink… you have no life in you” (John); “the words I have spoken to you are spirit and truth” (John); “who comes to me...rivers of living water will be springing up within them.” (John) a counsellor… this he spoke of the spirit who had not yet been given (?); "Our people must learn to spend their time doing good, in order to provide for real needs; they should not live useless lives." (Titus 3:14 GNBUK); "I have shown you in all things that by working hard in this way we must help the weak, remembering the words that the Lord Jesus himself said, ‘There is more happiness in giving than in receiving.’ ”(Acts 20:35 GNBUK)
God help your son to be a conduit for
your love that comes to him through light and air,
through humans who have smiled on him and more,
through your own heart that he's begun to share..
completing now the circuit of your pow'r..
the power of love that may look very weak,
help him inside to choose & not go sour
to let your love out in the acts that speak...
Dear God, our father, you who knows us well -
we show you how we are by what we do
and ask you to help us the Truth to tell
as best as we now can. Open to you,
and your creative options to learn love..
for we are small, and weak, and immature,
and made from dust as animals here gov-
earned by instincts that are not straight and sure.
We thank you that your own creative love
was breathed into the dust that is our lives,
& if you don't give wisdom from above
then we can’t be at all like Jesus Christ.
But the distinctive thing about that man
was he could clean us up from right inside,
our motives and directives, & he can
we’ve found and know that this can’t be denied
(of course it can if we choose our own world
but) this is what your leader came to lead
us in, wherever we are (by you) hurled
to show off small and weak light’s quite quick speed.
And so, as James learned from his big bro. then,
we’ll learn to let your love light do it's quick
and active thing within your world right when
a list’ning ear is needed. I am sick
of quickly talking, frustrating inside.
I give this sickly self to you, again.
Please heal me. I will walk, if I can’t ride
with you, or else Lord Jesus, touch your hem*.
After a phone discussion with my daughter (who has made the second turning, to grow younger as the daughter of her father in heaven) on a set of wierd incidents that had the smell of supernatural involvement and testing to snapping point… (but that through help provided by God, and followed through with by her, DID NOT snap her, but that almost appeared to strengthen her).
The second or third try, we gave up on the glitching phone, and decided to sing a hymn or Psalm that came to mind, where we were. This is the one that came to my mind and by this blog I am sharing it with you, daughter:
Footnotes
m* - Mark 5:21-37
Oh God we like the way you let us work
beside you as "your little helpers" and
there's no way that we ever want to shirk,
but neither to walk not "holding your hand".
It seems we're more like one-year-olds, or two-
year-olds who must refer often to you.
But this is not an immature state to
grow out of, it's the forward way for new...
new-humans in a New Creation of
the Heavens and the Earth, where we are like
left hemispheres of brains that aren't impov-
er-ished by their connection to the right...
We're very happy learning here to look
and see the things that grieve your heart in time,
and let you be our comforter who took
the burr-den out of burden, and who'll rhyme
a resurrection with creation's good
(and seven times in that process you "saw
that it was good", by letting all that could
do partnership with you, do that, and soar!)
So we would like to join up more with you.
Our chief delight is working hard beside
you, and at your direction a task to
do shopping, knocking, coffee, or to hide
away and hang out with our fam-il-y
is so delicious, a delight of life.
And we thank you for letting us just be
your offspring, vasal, friend, close as your wife.
So ask more questions when I feel that urge
to differ, or to incredulity;
before I let myself express to purge
the world from ignorance or foolery.
I see I'm called to follow in Christ’s wake:
ask for recalling or interpreting,
restatement, or on what basis they make
conclusions such as what I heard them bring
there to the table, metaphoric’ly,
to add to all this conversation fare.
Before I let reactions out of me,
I need to find out more, the When? & Where?
The Who?, What? How? and Why? of what I heard.
So letting them, in stages, spell out more.
For us to clarify not “give the bird”,
unless it is that dove that came before.
The dove, the homing pigeon, Noah sent
to bring back from the larger world outside
some news from all the places that it went
in flying round about. It sussed the tide.
Or else the dove from heaven coming down
and resting on him (not just shooed away)
and being welcomed, glad to have around
a smaller weaker one willing to stay,
and just to softly coo into his ear,
but also send him out to suffer well,
to serve as slave to all who would appear
and come into his orbit, whom he’d tell
that simple news to freshly, and then show
it off in all the habits of his life;
like what his little brother came to know
as quite distinctive, got him into strife!
The fun of teaming up with a great bird
(a being which can see beyond our sight)
is hard to put to word, but can be “heard”
through body language, acts that may, or might
communicate the energy it brings.
It’s more a “taste and see” yourself then know,
than theoretic-al com-pre-hend-ings.
Why even human friends surprise us. Though
you get to know their character somewhat,
and recognise their choices’ patterns as
the integrated higher life they’ve got
is here expressed, on Earth, with a pazazz.
And difference in the patterns keeps it fun.
The ever-learning new things to adjust
as love delights to do, that good be done
to benefit another - not from lust.
But that the will of God (that’s good; God’s love)
be spread and made more concrete on this Earth
by wisdom that we get from God above
as we hang out with this bird since our “birth”...
our “birth” I say, coz we have not controll’d
our birth, we are more passive, well respond-
-ers, mirroring through our own nature doled
out to us. Our job is “take it beyond…”
Not “on our own” (we wouldn't have a chance
of knowing how to drive such complex stuff).
We’re offered partnership, coaching to dance
by none other than THE creative love
who put this world together at the first…
and partnership in this love’s creating
of more good here (my heart is close to burst-
-ing) is the reason that I want to sing!
So "thank you" to this great creative love,
KHESED* itself, is everlasting for
it is synonymous with YaHWeH-dove,
and wiser than the serpents at the door.
It made them all, and gave us too the word,
capacity to hear, and then to speak,
but is itself more than we’ve ever heard
or seen with eye. Reality’s not bleak!
So just to clarify, and too recall:
to here fulfill love’s hopes and plans for me
I must first love the One God, overall,
and then the images of him that be
here living, moving round about, they walk,
and something in us loves to well, relate
to see each other, hear our father talk;
yet some acts build up love, and some build hate!
Will I expend my energies “to hear”?
To really hear his words & thoughts, and his..
..his motives and his ways to bring good cheer,
that set our heaven’s constellations wizz-
-zing overhead - which if we’ll start to see,
we’ll start to recognise and feel home in.
And this brings on, in us, an energy
that slows, and calms, as well as "soaks up sin*”.
This quickness in our soul to listen big,
observe, and note with active energy
what’s happ-en-ing a-round us, even dig -
for asking is a way of mining - see (!)
and active looking, listening is called
for in this world (where things are often hid)
not just more passive open up - stand tall,
but moving round, and asking what folk did.
And letting then, that spirit of KHESED
(creative covenantal love) speak out
with words, to bind itself to what it said,
so “slow to speak” is fitting, there’s no doubt!
And “slow to anger” is an upshot too,
for in this way of living that relates
more than reacts (by physics laws that do
their thing by mechanis-im’s measures, weights,
& thus can only try to quite suppress
the equal and the opposite force which
is just in line with physics in this mess -
which happens when relating gets “the ditch”).
And yet emotive-anger has a place
within a world where hell has taken root.
As shame’s a thing that should show on a face,
if shamefull acts we’ve done, we'll “give a hoot”!
If I am to be slow to spruik, to speak,
to say a word to others, in this world,
it’s prob’ly gunna be ’coz I’m too weak
to come across “on top” of all I’m told.
Then I won’t feel so confident myself
in knowing what to say that makes folk think
that I am truly knowing, wise & health-
-y. No jokes with a surreptitious wink!
‘Coz my own ego will feel bruised and warn,
not fresh - to battle up the hill, like goats.
Oh give me love’s own impulses, reborn
as crucified “with Christ” must then denote.
So here I hear his call once more to track
him through rejection by this world, and then
some unjust suffering & death, then back -
for forty days to hang about with friends.
And all this while I’m learning privately,
to keep an intimate “romantic”* life
quite flourishing, through which I’m re-viv-ed-
-ly nourished ‘coz love thrives when it's in strife!
So in this interchange, not built on words,
but giving rise to many “in their place”,
with bridge between the beings formed unheard
‘cept for the groanings love works into space.
And this gives rise (in ya’ way, YaHWeH God),
to new and living ways to walk on Earth,
not trying to be bolstered by this lot
I’m sent to show your love* to, since my birth.
If I will not be quick to listen then,
and now as well, I'll turn into A.I. -
dispensing facts and stories in a blend
to keep attention on me as I try
to not bore people, yet they’ll fall asleep,
or walk away, from boredom or disgust
at lack of listening and hearing deep-
-ly those around me, brought by God, from dust
but breathed into by YaHWeH God himself..
the spirit of an oversee-er who
can influence for more disease or health
within this world around, and Others too.
And what’s the thing that stands out in YaHWeH*?
I think it was “he IS, he IS*” - not “WAS”,
although he was as well, as people say
and always will be*. And that’s just be’coz..
..he didn’t just create, he keeps it here,
within his mind and purposes: he keeps
his word once he has given it. It’s queer,
he binds himself, is faithful*. Yet still weeps
or deeply grieves, when children go off track,
and doesn’t just unwind it all while one
of them remains who would perceive a lack
of faithfulness in father (or in son).
He’s bound to his own children such that he
is quick to listen, to expend himself.
And slow to speak, and “slow to anger”. We,
in growing up like him, come to our health..
As “of the earth”, and also “of the wind,
the breath or spirit of the very God”,
amphibious, or hybrid is not sin
depending on relationships we’ve got
with both the heavens* and the Earth beneath
our feet. For we could walk bowed down*, or crawl,
or lower still, could slither underneath
the legs of all, but we’re made to stand tall:
we walk, skip, jog, dance, even run erect,
yet need to bend our knees to move ahead.
These oft repeated practices* help set
our whole selves to the right spirit, as said
or maybe intimated, just before,
we didn’t make ourselves (nor all the Earth).
We are not over all, we’re under more
than just the God who gives us breath since birth..
the other sons of God, not of the Earth,
right now are ruling us, until we grow
up big enough to come out* (a new birth?)
and then be ruling/ judging them; or so
we’re told in bits that slip out now & then*.
But habits* where we prostrate ourselves here
before the only wise God, help defend
us from that kind of pride that has no fear,
respect of God’s word to declare his will;
and listen carefully, to understand
but going that much more, & further still,
to act it out on Earth* - as is the plan*.
My love and my peace come finally from God,
my worth and energy, thriving, from him.
And when you think of it, it would be odd
if it were otherwise, for we'd grow dim
when we weren’t recognised, accepted or,
acknowledged by the others - light might fade.
But we are heirs of Christ with his “much more”,
who conquers by the love-light God has made
to shine, and when it’s dark the light shines on,
it travels through the void quite easily.
It travels light! And then, by God, it’s gone.
It’s sent! And then its smile (uncheesily)
is seen on faces where it lands, the truth
is that it has direction - always OUT,
into the dark, with energy of youth,
determined toddler, but without the pout!
Its energy goes with it where it's sent.
In that way it’s still “of” the source it’s “from”.
It’s light, by nature. Light itself is meant..
- and shows up ev'ry-thing it lights upon,
but doesn't have much “push” itself, more “let” -
the situation now be clearly seen,
or understood, perceived, not to forget
so easily, and light is rarely mean
or heavy handed. Still, we know the sun,
from its distance to Earth, sources our life,
for plants store photons, sent & too begun,
& give us food and breath, in “all our strife*”.
Well what was happening to my old Dad
and what was happening within him too
when I was with him there for just a tad
a week ago I saw what he could do
when he was not in panic, manic mode,
but sharing life in weakness and in pain;
he couldn't talk so loud or long, he rode
the wave, confused, determined. Then again..
his son did not step in much to adjust
the outcomes, or to stop him pestering.
The son was honouring, as well he must
be if he’s not un-grateful, un-fitting.
So both, in strength and love of God relied,
and loveliness related in this world -
a little piece of heaven was espied.
Oh God I choose for that where I am hurled
by you the ever trusting, faithful one.
I, and my Dad with strength of God of love,
will learn to trust in you as your own son
who’d grow like his own father who’s above,
below, around each side, before & aft-
-ter too. Your wisdom & your faithfulness
we’ll use, aspire to (though we are quite daft
and often draw the wrong conclusions). Bless
me farther on, and farther in to you,
to grow old and to die well. God you showed
the later (& the former). May we too
fulfill your word to us, so you’ve not “blowed*”.
Yes, God we thank you that you've sent them there,
as really doing things that should be done,
and part of that's the friendship that's aware
of bigger friend who's here with ev'ryone!
!
!In tastes I've had of this (or in my dreams)
when this makes sense, describes a state that’s real..
the most important thing right then, it seems
is no longer “get ready”, so the feel
or focus, is not future, but the fun
of living life right now, in right rela-
tion with all those around here “under sun*”;
or as the Christ’s Ambassador might say:
“as much as is now possible, as far
as things depend on you, that is from your…
your side of your relationships, you are
responsible to live at peace, and more,
to now allow for thriving to be birthed,
not just with friends, but enemies as well*.”
He got that Way of living on God’s Earth,
developing relationships ’gainst hell,
from you know who, who was himself the true…
true model of all that he said, himself.
So as that Paul himself was wont to do,
I bow before this Master of True Health.
And understand, in bowing down (by choice -
not in self-serving weighing of future
recompense or payments back in poise
or fashion then accorded) - Here we are…
right in the holy carelessness of that
Eternal Now, where God himself - my breath,
my food & drink, quite freely comes to bat
in partnership as blasphemous as death.
There is a chance for me - ’coz every cell,
within my body has your written word
of life and love, and wisdom, who can tell -
your great amazing way is like absurd-
-ly good, and wonderful, above our “might”.
Your ways beggar belief.
’ don’t have a clue!
I’ll trust you even though I'm not too bright,
’n it doesn’t honour you much when I do.
But here I am just trusting your good word.
I think that’s good and right, because you keep
your word, and that’s what keeps all hell deterred,
along with death and pain - what makes folk weep…
And keeping your own word’s your kind of love,
not as a needy “I desire..” thing,
but my real needs fulfill, as “from above”
you look, and see, and know. You are the king!
The king of love, provision, & request
(from me, for my own good, to help me sing,
bring gladness, pleasure, power, and the best
of disciplines that come from treasuring).
Your ways aren’t of the dirty predator*.
But disciplined yourself, you help me learn
good manners and to think (as editor*)
before I speak, or act, or welcome, spearne,
allow others to “do their thing” dispense,
with me, to me, or me to them as well
(somewhat, because we have some influence).
You bring the smell of heaven, not of hell!
Oh what a privilege to share new life
with people who will work along with who
made this whole Universe, with all its strife,
and complex e-co-sys-tem-ic stuff too.
And how’d’e-do ’is greeting - with a “Hi!”?
o’ ’lo? which must go up or down to reach
each person. I must pull my head in, try
to not just entertain or even teach
but be “of benefit” to all, in all
I do and say (and even think) towards
the people I will contact, to not fall
into the habits of machines, but gods
who, though they're foetal, and not even “out”,
but still “in secret”, inside this great womb,
can start to make some choices - not to pout,
or tantrum! They’re part of the anti-doom!
So, yup! There’s always trouble in this world*.
And we’ll be quite involved in it, right at
the centre. Often times we have been hurled
right at it; God’s response team’s sent for that!
For crucifixion trouble, maybe Jo-
seph, with his “first-born son” foll-ow-ing sure.
And many others later with Nero.
For Peter all its horror was ignored.
For being thrown to Lions, there was Dan.
Then cent’ries later “Christ-i-ans” in Rome.
For dog trouble: St Patrick, Paul, (a man
the other year) in Thailand, Steve at home.
Oh God, to learn to think, in truth, help me
to do the practice, needed to assess,
to be in touch with your reality,
and less affected by appearances*!
You’ve given me the tools of trade I need,
to be a human - being here on Earth
in eco-system* which can fairly bleed,
in body* with changed blood-flow at its birth.
And offered then to share your wisdom too,
in fact it seems you’re very keen to. So
not hanging back, not scared of what we’ll do,
you’re lovingly determined t’help us grow.
And your determination to just bless,
I rarely see on Earth these days except
in settings of a fam’ly, where duress
is not just leaving angry folk bereft.
That real determined love that "digs in" for
the long haul, and for keeping its own word,
and not ’coz its desires made that call,
but ’coz it chooses to - in that absurd
‘ly supra-rational, but human way,
that doesn’t come to us from lower down,
or modelling, as A.I. does, or say
the hemisphere* that’s left, without the crown.
But as we learn from more mat-u-re ones,
what love and patience is, and humour too,
we grow more human as we play for fun,
and dance instead of march. And ‘old’ grows new*!
Dear Father, I am sixty six years old.
So now, in one more year I can retire.
Thus by most counts, I wouldn’t be too bold
to think that I’m a grown up. I’m a sire.
I’ve sired 6 living offspring on this Earth.
And have begun to learn to love from you.
But in that sense, I've hardly grown since birth.
And “Quite Mature” ’s a title I'd eschew.
Because I'm learning how to tell the truth.
And hearing my own self-talk now I know
what you have always known - you don’t need proof!
Compared to your age, I'm still foetal. So
this makes sense of what Jesus said about
the reign of God belonging only to
those who are little children. None are louts
or adolescents, adults with the view
of centuries, millenia or such.
I have to start my growth by learning truth
in inmost parts, in spirit*, heart’s own hutch
for living treasure, inside my tent “roof”.
So as a little child I call you now:
My Abba, Daddy, truest one who knows:
what ever’s worth the knowing or somehow,
whoever will be loving, where love grows
within them as a plant grows in the soil.
The seed of God’s been planted in this soul*
and as it grows the ground is like to boil,
& give birth then, a crop that makes more whole.
Oh God you are both wise and good, and know
me well (with even hairs upon my head).
Your essence, attitude, motives that show
in all your acting and withholding, said
to be the spirit of the only God,
well of the one defining what “God” means;
the first, and primal, pioneer who’s got
defining rights, for love’s mind often teems
with possibilities that multiply
(and exponentially), till out of sight.
You can not hold it down. Well they did try!
We're talking here of light on a dark night…
It’s out before you put the lid back on,
its oscillations are too numerous
to count in one life time, and then it's gone
and as it goes, it makes more universe
and fills it up with possibilities,
keeps on allowing us to more become
in line with all your spirit’s hopes and dreams
and wishes, which when spoken don’t make numb;
or do but in such do’s communicate
the love that’s underneath on which we thrive.
The love that swallows impotence and hate,
and knows the purpose that we are alive.
And IS it too, because we are offspring
(the tiny foetal “children”) of Yahweh.
He is the reason that we truly sing,
or celebrate, or speed up, or delay*.
Oh Lord you’ve given us such lovely gifts
and promises*, all backed up by your word.
The presence of yourself’s at top, and lifts
us up to heights, but handles "down" absurd-
ly well. When “Lifted up*” as Nathan said
the son of David would in future be,
to reign as king un-ending. Jesus shed
another meaning, more macabre that he
then understood [in light of history’s
developments in keeping human slaves,
instilling fear as chief of strategies
to keep the status quo, so none behaves
in disobedience to master’s will*
(that’s culture’s dictates as it does its job,
and those who found they’d rule the culture ‘til
they thought that with no pain they'd get “on top”)].
While he, as little child, lived underneath
his father’s will, completely doing all
his father willed, though clearly he’d bequeath
his own desires, quite openly, to fall
in line, behind, in ways his father led.
His naked motive pow’r would not coerce
but only love, ‘first God, then like -” he said,
- "his neighbour", act to help them choose, disperse-
-sing more the scent of heaven on the earth.
to live a higher life in partnership
with such creative love that gave us birth
and gives all* “goods” & services yet s(h)ipped.
You are the source of all the love I’ve known.
And all the food in this world, I believe,
is your creative love displayed and shown
in avenues of edibility.
Veluptuous and varied: sweet and sour,
strong and crisp, and crunchy, bubbly too.. ,
can all be lovely gifts at different hours
or contexts. For you know us through & through.
Responsive to initiatives from me,
You are: my senior, wiser, & more a-
-ble, seeking partnership as way to be.
The only thing unmoving, clearly sta-
-ble, is your HESED, strong and pure, deter-
mined, minded to grow me to be like you,
that your creative love be so inter-
preted, on Earth in ev’rything I do.
And all the gifts you've poured this way I see
are gifts of fam’ly love to grow kids strong.
And given for the best to grow in me
and you, and help us too, to both “belong”..
be long in suffering - that good may come
(not only when it brings pleasure to me)
but even when it breaks my heart, ..& some
things don’t feel good; I'll stay and over-see
that all is good (again) for thriving of
the whole she-bang, and which we will be long-
ing for its good to multiply: “tov tov”
as partnership is harmonized in song.
One lesson that appears to come is strange.
I need deep wisdom to decipher well
its meaning as pertains to me, arranged
by God himself to help me clearly tell..
So help me God to draw clear insights from
this evidence, as seen in Mark and Mike,
and Adam our progenitor Golem,
and what my wife has said to me tonight
about my making gen’ralizations
or proverbs from each story that I hear.
She said they sound like “morals” for nations
& makes me sound The Judge, so it appears.
It turns her off, she wants me quiet then.
I wondered if I said “I’m trying to
here understand a principle for when
we’re put in charge, so we’ll know what to do.”
But now I see that doesn’t fit his word:
“Man, who made me a ruler or a judge
who’s over you?*”, was what one fellow heard;
but John heard that the Father would not budge,
“he’s given judgement to his very Son*”.
It may be that he changed as people heard
it diff’rently, from diff’rent hopes begun
inside a person's head, expressed in word.
So I might need the Father’s wisdom fresh*
for ev’ryone I interact with here;
And that makes sense, for love will always mesh
in loving ways, with each one to appear.
Oh God I like the way you help, and that
you aren’t so very pushy; though you made
us up, and maybe just because we're flat
& hardly 3 dimensional, you bade
us to grow up to love with all our selves,
and pass that love along to others too,
you knew we’d need integrity and health
so we could multiply love, not just do
what comes into our heads, to tax it (as
we pass it on to others) for ourself;
for that’s against the nature that love has
- to trust the Universe, not fear with stealth.
You don’t try then, to make us do a thing;
you want us to discover and then choose,
and even ask for help to trust and sing
in presence of my enemies, all who’s
not for me and for honouring my life.
For Love’s an overcomer, it makes worlds,
and overcomes all nothingness and strife.
To trust it is to trust where you are hurled
so as Yeshua trusted in desert-
-ed places, when he needed food & drink,
that God, his Father would see (though he’s hurt)
that he would not be harmed (- as God would think).
So I will trust, and not give way to fears.
And let my pains and troubles in this womb
not count for more than what seems, or appears,
and let you be the judge o’er death & tomb.
My heart, I see today, is like a cup,
and it can carry water from a well
to my lips, and to any who look up
for help, & then whom God rigs against hell.
A sip might be the whole of what’s their need.
But cells like ours need water to survive,
so often they need more, each word and deed
can cup the water to their hands alive.
But they need water (& I too, no less)
to well up in their beings - all un-clocked!
The cup must lose its bottom, and be stretched,
become a hose, or portal that’s unblocked.
Reflection is requir’d to lively learn.
Here water helps (when steady, in its flow)
reflect a face, and see disgrace, & yearn
for better looks, and helps wash clean, I know
b’coz it's helped me many times: to drink,
to wash, to cool, to see back or reflect,
& then to help those others on the brink
of lack, or failure, to change course, deflect.
And ev’ry win (in stages) helps resolve
to grow. The wind resistance helps to train
obedience, that’s out of loyal love.
That helps us to move forward, once again.
And then to top it off, God’s eyes (in pairs)
see worth of whom they worked hard to obey.
He hardened Pharaoh’s heart, but softened theirs,
through doing will of God (in Christ), I'd say.
My heart, I see today, is like a cup,
and it can carry water from a well
to my lips, and to any who look up
for help, & then whom God rigs against hell.
A sip might be the whole of what’s their need.
But cells like ours need water to survive,
so often they need more, each word and deed
can cup the water to their hands alive.
But they need water (& I too, no less)
to well up in their beings - all un-clocked!
The cup must lose its bottom, and be stretched,
become a hose, or portal that’s unblocked.
To live well as a human is to learn
and that needs time and focus to reflect.
And steady water flowing helps me yearn
and gives to drink, to cool, to see, deflect-
-ing/ softening the skin and nails (and heart?),
and washing clean as well (that is a lot!).
The opposite of still, can be an art-
form that will call out ev’ry thing we've got!
And washing out a hardness of the heart,
and stubbornness, and dullness, was a storm;
with wind that made it harder to impart
obedience from spirit clear though worn.
But then creative love itself stepped in-
to situation, onto water top,
and walked along as though he’d often been
for strolls like this, and would he ever stop?
Today I seemed to see how love can grow.
I know the case of how it can die back:
with kinds of hardness that a heart can know
when all of life is comfort, with no lack.
And somehow in the art’ries (where life flows)
the lack of lack, brings hard’ning, not much flex;
ta heart must pump the blood both fast and slow
sometimes, and yet be ready for what’s next.
And love’s the only thing that has these both:
the power & the will to cover up
(with band-aid-like capacity to know th-
- at healing’s from inside & then erupts.
And I, as just an animal, can not
learn love, except to copy what it does;
for love takes two to tango. One be God.
His partner is the flow’r, (where bee does buzz).
And living in a partnership is the
ground-breaking way of life, like jump from sing-
-gle celled amoeba… right up to multi-
to multi-cellular big living thing.
And with this partnership as ground beneath
our feet, to walk upon - provide support,
to teach us how to love, & to bequeath,
contribute, not just take - us back to naught
we'll bring creative options into view.
Creative love invites, so I will too,
so learn to sit, and cover for all who
fall short. I’ll simply let them also choose.